About a year or so into COVID, I tried to revamp my website.
I was trying desperately to be a good little blogger and post consistently (like they say to do), stick to one topic (like they say to do), and engage my audience more via social media platforms (like they say to do), but then I remembered:
I’ve rarely taken conventional paths in my life. Why start now? (also I’m pretty terrible at routines and slowly lose the will to live if forced to do the same thing over and over. So this was really never sustainable.)
I say all that to say: I hope you all will still enjoy whatever I write, whenever I get around to writing it. But if not, I understand.
I also want to pre-apologize because right now I’m feeling a bit overwrought and throwing spaghetti against the wall in the hopes I land on some new goals to pursue. In the process, you may see me try out different things publicly — because I’m an over-sharer with little shame and I just can’t help myself.
I’m calling this my COVID-life crisis.
I don’t think any of us escaped being confronted these last few years with questions about how we spend our time, who we spend time with, and our general purpose.
For me, I started needing a creative outlet again (like that time I ended up joining a band because I was working at FEMA and we were in-between hurricanes and I don’t do well with downtime.)
I felt a bit manic in the first years of COVID — which is totes normal for an Enneagram Type 7 like myself. (If you haven’t taken the Enneagram assessment, stop right now and go do it. And then come back to me so we can geek out over our Types and make judgement calls about everyone else around us and what type we are sure they are and why our type is obviously superior. Because isn’t that the real point of personality assessments?)
Anyway, back to my search for fulfilment.
I knew I wanted to write more. And I knew I wanted to reengage the unlikely runner community I connected with when my book came out.
I also wanted to help others reach their goals, get positive messages out in the world, and help people write and sell books that make a difference.
And start a podcast.
And sell runner gear.
Is that too much to ask?
Sigh.
Ok fine. I could maybe use a little more direction.
In the Army, they call it the Azimuth check.
It has something to do with a compass, or using stars for navigation or something. I don’t completely know because I only speak partial Army seeing as I’m actually in the Navy, although I wind up serving with the Army more than I’ve ever wound up serving on the sea (thankfully, since I get nauseous surfing…) but you get the point. Conducting an Azimuth check is essentially a way to make sure you haven’t wandered off course.
Around 2021, I have to admit, I was probably following a few too many North Stars. But the only way I know how to do anything is to just… do it.
So, I ended up with some false starts and having to backtrack on some projects the last couple years. And that can be confusing and frustrating. But the alternative to putting ourselves in some uncomfortable places is to stay in our comfort zones and never get new experiences. Who wants that?
Coming out of early COVID life and into whatever we’re in now, I think we can all agree life is too precious for “good-enough.” I intend to keep finding new goals to pursue, to set better boundaries around my time and my values, and to keep getting out of my comfort zone. I hope you do too. Let’s encourage each other! (Or, at least let’s all keep laughing together at any ridiculousness that comes with excursions outside the comfort zone. That’s fun too.)
